The Sky is Falling!

When I was a kid my family used to vacation in Arkansas. It was a touristy area with all sorts of fun family outings like the alligator farm and the wax museum.

One outing that stands out in my mind was a zoo with unusual pet tricks. You could see a raccoon dunk a basketball or a duck do math. But that’s not what I remember. I remember a CHICKEN PLAYING THE PIANO. That’s right — That chicken would go up to a toy piano and plunk out Jingle Bells to the delight of my little 7-year old brain. To be clear, this was WAY more than chicken poop bingo. They were really playing the notes.

You can train a chicken to play notes on the piano. Read that again. You can train a chicken to play notes on the piano. You can train. a. chicken. to. play. notes. on. the. piano.

From time to time I mention this during lessons. I’ve also seen videos of a beagle, a kitten, and a guinea pig pushing the piano keys. But notice I’ve been careful to say “play notes” or “push keys.” These animals are cute and impressive. They are worth the admission to the Pet Trick Zoo. They are not playing the piano.

Playing the piano is more than pushing keys and hoping for the best. Playing the piano is coordination. It’s dynamics. It’s fine motor control. It’s articulation. It’s voicing. It’s pedal. It’s meter and tempo. It’s blind leaps and scalar shifts. It’s making a percussion instrument play vertical stacks into a horizontal phrase. It’s arm and wrist. It’s heart and soul. It’s human. Playing the piano demands humanity.

Until that chicken gives me a beautifully phrased melody, I won’t worry about job security.

Sometimes people show me midi performances, or AI generated music, or green dots falling from the sky on YouTube tutorials. Occasionally people will comment about how computer-generated music will replace musicians. Ooogity Boogity! And it’s true: those dots sure are accurate. They hit every note every time. You can slow them down and speed them up with the click of a button. We are being replaced. Music is dead. The sky is falling!

Deep breath, Chicken Little. Dots are not human. Artificial Intelligence is not human. MIDI isn’t human. They can be tools. I will send midi files of newly crafted works that I’ve arranged. I’ve used piano tutorials to learn contemporary music yet to be published. Computer generated music isn’t the enemy. It’s a tool – just like a metronome or a music stand or the piano itself.

What makes it MUSIC is the performer bringing it to life. Humans crave connection, and music connects us to stories and histories and traditions beyond ourselves. Yes notes are a part of music and accuracy is a part of a good performance. But notes are not music. The chicken doesn’t play piano — she’s just peckin keys and hopin’ for treats. A MUSICIAN plays the piano.

Music demands that every time you sit at your instrument you seek music. Don’t just play the notes. Don’t just hit the pitches. Bring your whole self to the instrument. Bring the sum of your humanity to the instrument. Bring the sticky bits and the hard stuff and the laughter and the joy to the instrument.

Don’t be a chicken; play with ACTUAL intelligence.